Mary and Ray Sayward: A Love Story
by Kathleen Downey
This expatriate-townie love story began at the Port Rec Center on Story Ave. more than 40 years ago. With a roller skating rink upstairs, a bowling alley downstairs, and a snack bar, “The Rec” was a popular hangout for young people. And it is where a country boy from Low Street (then a dirt road populated by farms) met a city girl from Fair Street, who would become his wife.
I chatted with Mary and Ray Sayward at their dining room table, and they shared with me fond memories of their courtship in a simpler Port City. With a mischievous twinkle in his eye, Ray tells me that prior to meeting Mary, he “hadn’t much cared for city slickers.” But after giving the city slicker a bowling lesson, Ray was smitten. They both laugh when recalling Mary’s first driving lesson at Salisbury Beach State Reservation. “I told her, don’t slam the brakes!” says Ray. But Mary did slam the brakes, and-these were the days before seat belts-Ray smacked his forehead against the windshield. He rubs his forehead at the memory.
As a young man, Ray worked as a baker at Prost Bakery. “He always smelled like a loaf of bread,” Mary tells me. With mock perturbation she adds, “But he’s never baked me a loaf in all the years we’ve been together!” Her charge elicits a promise from her husband. “I’m going to surprise you one of these days and bake you a loaf,” Ray tells Mary.
Recently retired from his position as a greeter at Walmart (Ray worked for Waverly news for many years prior), Mary jokes that her husband enjoys celebrity status, resulting from the many “Hellos” he dispensed while working at the discount superstore. Ray modestly, and perhaps with a bit of feigned embarrassment, denies such fame. Not to let her husband off so easily, Mary tells me whenever they go out locally, “The ladies are always saying ‘Hello’ to him.”
Mary retired in 2007 from Port Health Care Center (Port City Rehab), where she had been an administrative assistant. These days, Mary keeps herself busy as the newsletter editor for The Compassionate Friends of Greater Newburyport (www.tcfnewburyport.org), the local chapter of a worldwide organization that offers support to those who have experienced the death of a child, sibling, parent or grandparent. Ray assists Mary with labeling, printing, and newsletter distribution. “We’re a team,” he says.
But their effort is also profoundly personal and poignant. Mary tells me, “We do this in our child’s name.” Almost nine years ago, Mary and Ray lost their beautiful 29-year-old daughter Marci through a terrible car accident. Mary describes her work for Compassionate Friends as both rewarding and emotional. “I didn’t know I was capable,” she confesses, reflecting upon her ability to help others. Through the newsletter, not only has she helped others, but Mary has found her own strength to persevere. “I have learned a lot about loss and about how to handle it. I know the horrible, long road of grief one travels when losing a child.” Touched by his wife’s words, Ray’s eyes fill; he nods his head in quiet agreement.
In a moment, the former country boy and one-time city slicker resume their banter. “It’s nice to laugh,” Mary tells me. “Laughter is so important.” Ray chimes in, and with no apparent segue and with unintended comedic intent, he reiterates his promise to bake that loaf of bread for his wife-and take her on a long overdue bowling date. Mary laughs.
Today, the expatriate couple (Mary and Ray now live in Amesbury), enjoys coming to the Port and bumping into other long-ago townies, eating lunch at Michael’s Harborside or Starboard Galley, and meandering the streets of the South End, where their reminiscences greet them like old friends on the rolling brick sidewalks. When they aren’t crossing the Chain Bridge into Newburyport, Mary and Ray find joy in visiting their grandson Shamus, daughter Melissa, and her husband Jay, who reside in Haverhill.
Kathleen Downey is a contributing writer to Newburyport-Today if you are a “Townie” and would like to be interviewed by Kathleen, please let us know!
